MNN Breaking News UPDATE

Manufactured News Network: “Now, More Than Last Tuesday Afternoon around 3!”

BREAKING NOW...

( Chinese Colony of OvalOfficestan, D.C.) China's Biden and China's Xi to meet in-person 

The meeting is set to take place wherever and whenever Chairman Xi says.

"Frankly, I've grown weary of issuing my commands through Gen. Milley's Shanghai Love Line. I want to see my favorite pet in person," said Winnie the Xi.

For his part, Biden is widely expected to just get it over with and name an aircraft carrier after the Communist Dictator. Not himself--Xi.

"Joe doesn't know it yet, but I've entered him in next year's Westminster Competition," said Joe's owner.

                                                                 "Good boy!"

In other news, Hunter Biden expressed gratitude to Regime safecrackers for letting him out of Donald Trump's wall safe, where the FBI had placed him since June 3rd.

Herr Director Chris Wray Gives Statement Before Concertina Congress

“Ladies and gentlemen, I’ll be brief. The issue here is not whether we broke a few rules, or the entire U.S. Code, or took a few liberties with our system of Rule by the People–we did. But you can’t hold a whole rogue agency responsible for the behavior of a few, sick twisted individuals. For if you do, then shouldn’t we blame the whole Regime Justice System? And if the whole Regime Justice System is guilty, then isn’t this an indictment of our Occupation Government Institutions in general? I put it to you, Barack – isn’t this an indictment of our entire American society? Well, you can do whatever you want to us, but we’re not going to sit here and listen to you badmouth the United States of America. Gentlemen–we’ve got some safes to crack!”

Manufactured News Network: "Impersonating Journalists Impersonating Journalism since Rich was Little!"