BREAKING NON-NEWS...
JUST MOMENTS AGO, IN A SURPRISE EARLY-MORNING RAID, THE FBI DID NOT SERVE A FEDERAL SEARCH WARRANT TO VICIOUSLY BREAK IN TO JOE BIDEN'S REHOBOTH BEACH HOME.
WHILE NOT THERE, THE AGENTS DID NOT BRANDISH MACHINE GUNS WHILE A TEAM OF SAFECRACKERS DIDN'T CRACK BIDEN'S WALL SAFE. THE AGENTS DID NOT SPEND 12 HOURS SEIZING ALL THE BIDENS' PERSONAL PAPERS WHILE PAWING THROUGH JILL BIDEN'S UNDERWEAR DRAWERS--AND EVEN HUNTER'S, TOO.
THE AGENTS SAID SOMETHING ABOUT THERE NOT BEING ENOUGH MONEY IN THE WORLD TO MAKE THEM DO THAT.
OR THEY WOULD HAVE SAID IT, IF THEY WERE THERE.
BUT THEY WEREN'T.
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| BEDLAM NOT BREAKING OUT AT THE BIDEN HOME |
MNN WILL MONITOR ALL FUTURE NON-DEVELOPMENTS CLOSELY AND KEEP YOU IGNORANT.
In other news, Gavin Newsome was measured by the White House draperies today and found him de-pleated.
Elsewhere, Andrew “Little Goebbels” Weissman, "Stabby" Stabenow, "Blackhawk" Omar and “Buck” Schiff are all throwing Obiden under the ‘Vette.
Clearly, marching orders have gone out from Barry’s Basement HQ.
Manufactured News Network: "If They Didn't Have Double Standards, They'd Have Triple!"
UPDATED NON-UPDATE:
BIDEN TO SOLVE CLASSIFIED DOCUMENT PROBLEM BY RENAMING GARAGE "THE NATIONAL ARCHIVES"
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| "Problem solved! Let's go get some Chinese, Dad." |
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