MNN Leaking News Update

LEAKING NOW…

* PELOSI SAYS SHE KNOWS SHE DIDNT RECEIVE A $114 MILLION GRANT FOR HER WINERY BECAUSE SHE WOULD HAVE PURCHASED STOCK OPTIONS

* JUDGE JAMES BOASBERG, CLEARLY FRUSTRATED WITH THE TRUMP WHITE HOUSE, HAS ORDERED JOE BIDEN TO BE FLOWN BACK FROM DELAWARE AND REINSTALLED. 

JUDGE BOTOX PROMISED THAT AFTER THAT, HE WOULD STOP INJECTING HIMSELF INTO THE PRESIDENCY

* BOASBERG, aka "JUDGE NOT" ORDERS PRESIDENT TRUMP TO APOLOGIZE TO HOUTHIS AND ALL THE BLOWFISH FOR MISSILE STRIKES… EXPERTS SAY "UNLIKELY"

* HOUTHIS COMPLAIN ABOUT SIGNALGATE LEAKS: "IT TAKES ALL THE FUN OUT OF IT". THEY ALSO CLAIM GOLDBERG IS A NEO-CON WARMONGER AND ATLANTIC IS NOT PACIFIC

AS REPARATIONS, THEY DEMAND RESTORATION OF THEIR USAID FUNDING

* JUDGE BOASBERG RULES THAT THE TRUMP ADMINISTRATION MUST SWITCH TO AOL.COM INSTANT MESSAGING

AND RESTORE HIS USAID FUNDING

UPDATE: 

Pictured here: Judge Skeletor & Bones goes judge-shopping on the New and Used Judges Showroom Floor

* JUDGE BOASBERG RULES THAT ALL HIS COURT PROCEDINGS WILL BE HELD ON SIGNAL CHAT

BUYS LOTTERY TICKETS AFTER BEING "RANDOMLY" CHOSEN FOR FOURTH CASE

* JUDGE BOASBERG RULES THAT TRUMP'S CIA IS PRICE GOUGING ON ITS OPIUM AND COCAINE PRODUCTS AND MUST LOWER PRICES

* JUDGE BOASBERG RULES PRINCE HARRY MUST DIVORCE ANGELA MERKEL

* JUDGE BOASBERG RULES THAT "HITLER FINDS OUT HOW JUDGE BOASBERG RULED"-MEMES ARE A THREAT TO NATIONAL SECURITY AND SUBJECT TO A FISA WARRANT, JUST LIKE THE TIME HE TRIED TO OVERTHROW PRESIDENT TRUMP

* JUDGE BOASBERG RULES THAT CENTRAL AMERICAN MIGRANTS MAY NOT SEND WESTERN UNION MONEYGRAMS WHILE HE IS TRYING TO GET HELP AT THE GROCERY STORE SERVICE COUNTER

* JUDGE BOASBERG RULES ITS PRONOUNCED "BIBBERTY"

* JUDGE BOASBERG RULES "NATIONAL DAY OF MOURNING" FOR ELON MUSK'S RESCUE OF ASTRONAUTS

*JUDGE BOASBERG RULES THE BULLET HOLE IN JFK'S WINDSHEILD BE REPAIRED BY CALLING SAFELITE REPAIR, SAFELITE REPLACE

*JUDGE BOASBERG RULES THAT TRUMP ADMINISTRATION MUST MAKE THE STRUCTURES FOUND TWO MILES BENEATH THE PYRAMIDS ADA COMPLIANT AND WHEELCHAIR ACCESSSIBLE

*JUDGE BOASBERG RULES THAT HE WILL PERSONALLY FLY A C-130 TO EL SALVADOR TO RESCUE THE WRONGLY-IMPRISONED VICTIMS OF DONALD TRUMP'S FASCIST AMERICAN POLICE STATE 

AFTER A BRIEF R&R LAYOVER IN CUBA TO DECOMPRESS, HE WILL BRING THE CARTEL MEMBERS BACK TO AMERICA AND GIVE THEM CITIZENSHIP, SMALL ARMS AND SCHOLARSHIPS TO YALE, AFTER WHICH HE WILL SWEAR THEM IN AS FISA JUDGES, THE WAY THE FRAMERS INTENDED(tm)

* JUDGE BOASBERG RULES SEAN HANNITY IS A 99% DEGREE BLACK BELT

 * JUDGE BOASBERG RULES THAT HE IS NOW CHIEF JUSTICE AND JOHN ROBERTS WILL GO BACK TO HIS FORMER JOB AS AN EXTRA ON JEEP COMMERCIALS FOR PERRY COMO CHRISTMAS SPECIALS

All suspects are considered innocent until proven guilty in a court of law.
Or the Supreme Court.

Manufactured News Network: "Now Day-Drinking with Senator Benett!"