Sunday, July 3, 2016

The Forget-ening: Remembrance and The Federal Bureau of Security Review

Granny Clinton's Milk of Amnesia


Good Morning, Secretary Clinton. Thank you for coming."
"Where am I?"
"'re giving a deposition."
"You mean like at my bank?"
"No, ma'am, not a deposit. A deposition. About your e-mails and your server."
"You mean Serge? He was my server at Four Seasons last night. He was so wonderful."
"No, ma'am. The server you wiped clean."
"You mean like wiped with a dishcloth?"
"No, ma'am. We're also concerned you were hacked."
"It's just a little cough. I'll be fine."
"No, ma'am. Hostile governments read all your e-mails."
"But there were Secret Service agents outside the door."
"Yes, ma'am, but...well, let's just move on."
"Dot Org."
"Um...okay. Let's start with how your server was set up. Did you..."
"I don't remember."
(Hillary's attorney, whispering: "Not yet, Madame Secretary.")
"You didn't let me ask the question. When did you first..."
"I don't recall."
"Recall what?"
"I don't remember."
"Mrs. Clinton, this is going to take three and a half hours if you don't remember anything."
"I have no recollection."
"Okay; I see where this is going."
"I don't remember going there."
"Do you remember anything at all?"
"I forget."
"Anything about deleting 35,000 e-mails?"
"I don't recall not remembering that I forgot I have no recollection."

(three and a half hours later...)

"Then, to recap, is it your testimony that you don't remember who, what, when, where, why, how or how much about anyone, anything, anywhere at any time having to do with anything at all? Is that your testimony, Mrs. Clinton?"
"Is that my name?"
"Okay, I see we're done here."
"One more thing, Senior Agent Williams; I hope I can count on your vote in November."
"You remember my name?"
"Of course I did. We met at the Watergate Hearings in 1973. And say "hi" to Betty and the kids Biff and Missy. Oh, they must have kids of their own by now. Got any grandkid pictures? Bill and I love to talk about our grandkids."
"And golf--yes, we've heard."
"Remember: Vote for me in November--don't forget!"
"At this point, ma'am, what possible difference could it make?"
"Very funny, Agent Williams. I'll remember that."
"And I will always remember this day, Madame Secretary."
"And I've already forgotten it."

"I'm outta' here."
We hope so.

No comments:

Post a Comment