Because Giving a Damn Meant Hurting Obama's Re-Election Chances and That Was Job #1. Always.
So the Times writes a phony story about the Trump campaign and the Russians. The FBI investigates. After an unrelated meeting, the FBI's McCabe pulls Preibus aside and tells him the Times story is "BULLSHIT". Priebus asks if the FBI can tell everybody. McCabe says sorry, no. But with permission, Preibus says "Intel Officials told me the Times story is phony".
So the Times then writes an even phonier story about how Preibus hunted down McCabe and angrily demanded the FBI exonorate Trump and do PR spin for the administration.
In short, the New York Times is now lying about lying about lying about lying.
Meanwhile, the Washington Post has come out with their new Drama Queen Victim Status motto:
Message: "We Are Heroic Tellers of Inconvenient Truth to the Evee-ill Trump Regime!"
Newsflash, kids; Democracy already did Die in Darkness, the darkness you helped enable in eight years of kissing Obama's behind.
But, no thanks to you, Democracy made a Comeback anyway. Because Darkness Dies in Democracy!
If Donald Trump were running a Billion-Dollar Bribery Empire out of the State Department and funneling the bribes through his charity, would the Lackey Media give him the same toadyish, supine deference they showed to Bribe-Me Granny?
We don't have to guess; when Trump built an oversized flagpole in Florida, he agreed to pay a fine on the condition that the money go to veterans charities. The Poodle Press insisted this was equal to Bibe-Hilda's sale of our uranium to Putin for $145 million in Foundation Grift. Same thing.
What if Trump decreed a One-Man Treaty with Russia just like Obama did with Iran? And conspired with the Kremlin to lie to the American people about it like Obama did with the Mullahs? Sending Russians billion$ in cash, paying ransoms, letting them violate arms treaties and assisting Putin's nuclear program?
HEADS EXPLODE AS SCREAMING BANNER HEADLINES DEMAND IMPEACHMENT NOW!!!!!!!
But Obama does it and not a peep from these heroes.
Meek little lambs, all of the sudden. The Silence of the Lambie-kins. It's kinda' sweet, even. Democracy Died There...and you champions of truth were AWOL. Wait--that's not right; you weren't absent, you were present, and cheering your Man on!
In fact, forget Russia. Ask yourself this--and don't lie:
What if Trump did THE EXACT SAME DEAL WITH IRAN THAT OBAMA DID?
It would be The End Of The World! Trump Subverts Senate's Treaty Power! Constitutional Crisis! Republic Hangs In Balance! Dangerous Madman! Trump Funds Terrorists! Impeach Yesterday, Today and Forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But, no. Obama did it. It must be good. His pants are neatly creased. No problem. Don't Question It. We certainly won't. Hello Darkness, My Old Friend.
Speaking of Darkness, the Washington Post motto jokes almost write themselves.
The New York Times, of course, already has a famous motto. No, not "All the News That's Fit to Print". I mean this one: "What Enchants You the Most?", the hard-hitting question their reporter demanded of BOTUS (Boyfriend of the United State). That's what went for "Speaking Truth to Power!" for eight long years--and longer, really.
More suggested Washington Post mottos:
THE WASHINGTON POST
*To crush our enemies, to see them driven before us, and to hear the lamentations of our womanly editors
*Democracy Dies in Darkness--and Democrat Party Dies in Eight Years of Obama
*Now With "Bash the Fash" Fashion Section!
*Taking $8.62 Off Your Amazon Purchase of Democracy Today!
*We'll Be Here All Week, Folks!
*We Invented MyPillow in Our Home State of Minnesota
*Will You Take A Post-Dated Check?
*#WeAreMuslim,Too--no, seriously. we are.
*Covering Sweden Intermittently!
*Eyeing the Plumber Suspiciously
*He's Being Mean To Us!
*Democracy Dies When You Live in Constant Fear Like An Air-Traffic Controller at the Sound of Harrison Ford's Call Letters
*If You Think We Are Going to Give You Your Country Back Without a Fight You Are Sadly Mistaken
Ah--The Truth, at last.