BREAKING NOW...
* ACTING SECRET SERVICE DIRECTOR ROWE REQUESTS CHANGE IN TRUMP RALLY VENUE FROM WILKES-BARRE TO JOHN WILKES-BARRE
"EYEBROWS WERE RAISED" SAID PELOSI--BUT SHE ALWAYS SAYS THAT
* A SECRET SERVICE AGENT FACES DISCIPLINE AFTER LEAVING HER POST AT A RECENT RALLY TO BREASTFEED HER CHILD. IT WAS NOT "BRING YOUR CHILD TO SMOKE TRUMP-DAY" AND THE BREASTS IN QUESTION EXCEEDED AGENCY SAFETY GUIDELINES FOR STEEPNESS
* AFTER CLAIMING HIS HIGH-AND-TIGHT HAIRCUT PROVES HIS INNOCENCE, ACTING OUT DIRECTOR ROWE IS WORKING ON REFORMS THAT HE IS CONFIDENT WILL BRING THE NUMBER OF AGENCY-COMMITTED ATTEMPTED MURDERS WITHIN ACCEPTABLE LIMITS
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"Not Guilty!" |
* RFK JR. ON HIS HARRIS ENDORSEMENT/UNENDORSEMENT:
"MY POSITION FROM YESTERDAY MORNING IS NOW UNRECOGNIZALE TO ME AND I CANNOT RECONCILE IT WITH MY DEEP STATE HANDLERS. DAMN YOU, BRAINWORM!"
HOWEVER, "UPSTATE BEAR AND THE BRAINWORMS" WOULD STILL MAKE A GOOD NAME FOR A ROCK BAND
Manufactured News Network: "We Wanted to Work for the CIA But They Already Had the Langley Post!"
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