MNN BREAKING NOW...
* DEMOCRAT GUBERNATORIAL CANDIDATE DR. ANY ACTON IS CLAIMING TO BE AN ASSASSINATION SURVIVOR AFTER A MAN RUDELY PUSHED HIS WAY TO THE FRONT OF HER EVENT, KNOCKING OVER TWO OLD FOLKS
THE MAN WAS LATER FOUND TO BE LEGALLY ARMED, BUT NEVER DISPLAYED ANY WEAPONS
ODDLY, HOWEVER, THE MAN YELLED "CHICAGO IS MAGA COUNTRY!" EVEN THOUGH THE EVENT WAS IN OHIO
ACTON NOW FACES LEGAL ACTION FROM UNEMPLOYED ACTOR JUSSIE SMOLLET FOR PLAGIARIZING HIS PATENTED HOAX HATE CRIME SYMPATHY GAMBIT(tm).
THE INTERNATIONAL BROTHERHOOD OF NIGERIAN HATE CRIME WORKERS HAS ALSO FILED SUIT, CLAIMING ACTON FAILED TO CONSIDER UNION MEMBERS WHEN HIRING FOR THE POSITION
ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, ACTON WAS OFFERED A JOB BY GERMANY'S LEIPZIG AIRPORT
"WE'RE ALVAYS LOOKING FOR HIGH-QUALITY FALSE FLAG TALENT. CALL ME, AMY," SAID AIRPORT DIRECTOR SHICK L. GRUBER, BROTHER OF FAMED GERMAN PILOT HANS GRUBER
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| "Tell Volody I love himmmmmmmmm!" |
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| Here, Jussie and Kamala plan the #FakeLynching that will catapult Kam & Corey into the White House. "allegedly". |
"Always look for the Union Label!"
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| "Remember, kids: can't find a last-minute Red MAGA Hat for all your MAGA Frame-Up needs? Crafty Beaver has you covered!" I'm Dr. Amy Acton and I approved all this Actin'! |
MOMMY DEAREST- UPDATE:
* IN OTHER ELECTION NEWS, OUR MNN CAMERAS WERE THERE:
“What am I–chopped liver? With all the other loco Crazies we’ve got, I’m afraid they’re going to forget about me by the South Carolina primary, Senator.”
“No problemo, Kilmar. I call this Spanberger-in-a-Can, Model 81 Million, mi amigo!”
RELATED:
* US SOUTHERN COMMAND HAS BEEN SINKING CARTEL REFUELING SHIPS IN THE PACIFIC
PRISONERS WERE TRANSFERRED TO ECUADOR, EXCEPT FOR ONE "JAIME BOASBERG", WHO WAS RELEASED ON HIS OWN RECOGNIZANCE
AND IN OTHER INTERNATIONAL NEWS...
* BRITISH AUTHORITIES PLEDGE TO STOP AIDING ISLAMIC INVADERS AT PORTSMOUTH BY CHANGING THE TOWN'S NAME TO "CEUTA"
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Artist's rendering of Government renovations proposed for downtown Portsmouth, now "Ceuta" |
* DER MERZFUHRER HAS ROBBED AfD OF ITS HISTORIC ELECTION VICTORY IN GERMANY WITH ZEE USUAL MAIL-IN BALLOT FRAUD
POLL-WATCHERS KNEW SOMETHING WAS AMISS AFTER MERZ RECENTY PETITIONED A GERMAN COURT TO CHANGE HIS NAME TO "JOSEPH ROBINETTE BIDENS-KREIG"
| Merz's Christian Democratic Union celebrates their Election Theft by being none of those things |
* CANADA HAS RESUMED MILITARY TALKS WITH CHINA
UNFORTUNATELY, THAT TALK WAS "SIR, YES, SIR!"
Manufactured News Network: "Show Us Where the Bad Man Touched You on This Anatomically Correct Crafty Beaver!"
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